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Monday, January 31, 2011

Someone Needs to Blow the Grenade Whistle on Sammi and Ron's Relationship: Week 5 Points

What's up JSFL Kookas?

A pretty eventful week. I really thought we were finally going to see the end of Rommi. Unfortunately for Ronnie owning teams and anyone who enjoys watching single Ronnie in action, we're going to have to keep waiting and watching those two lying in bed together. Alas. Here's the Commish's email:

Subject: Points in a Glass

God, I have so many thoughts about last night's episode. First off, I was so close to giving Ron and Sam breakup points (thinking that this was when she left the house), only to have it turned around overnight. Going by last year's standard, that is not a breakup.

Second, quite a few close judgment calls that I had to make. I will explain them all. Following the twitter consensus, I'm giving Sitch smush points. Also, J-Woww is getting smush points, for possibly the first ever smush-but-no-makeout scorecard. I'm also awarding Vin makeout points for the girl with the crazy uncle, because while we didn't see anything, they were moving in to each other, then cut to uncle, then a pull away. That said, I'm flexible on this.

The last judgment call was awarding J-Woww points for bringing home a random. We had this discussion last year, and my feeling is that if you're not a roommate, a bf/gf from home, or an established couple to the point that we would award break-up points, you qualify as a random - ie. Roger. Again, though, I would listen to dissent.

Finally, the scorecard doesn't have anything for "Likes to lick ass", so sadly, Deena goes points-free this week.

Let's get to it!
Ronnie - 38: cried twice (4x2=8), got in girl/guy fight with roommate (15x1.5=22.5), made out with roommate (5x1.5=7.5)
Sam - 42: cried thrice (4x3=12), got in girl/guy fight with roommate (15x1.5=22.5), made out with roommate (5x1.5=7.5)
Mike - 20: brought home random (5), smashed (15)
Vin - 10: brought home random (5), made out (5)
Paul - 5: brought home random (5)
j-Woww - 20: brought home random (5), smashed (15)
Snooki and Deena - 0

Looks like I put up a resounding 60... yay?

Commish Amsterdam


My response to the Commish's questions:

Yeah, I think we're going to have to wait for Sam to move out before we can award break-up points. I'm not sure how you qualify "one day at a time" point-wise. I'm with you there Mr. Amsterdam.

It's a tough call with Vin's makeout. I'm going to go to the tapes to review because I can't remember it too well. Superficially I'd say if they dont' show it it doesn't count but let me look again in slow motion zoomed in (control-scroll) before offering my final thoughts there.

I think Jwoww gets the random points for sure this week but I think once they smoosh it stops being random. Like, if she brings him home next week he's not a random. We did the same thing with Pauly and Rocio last year. First night back is a random, every time after that, not so much. I guess the rule of thumb is just return visitors. Last year I also scored it for Vin the first time he brought home that girl, but then after beach day she was no longer a random.


So I think that should settle things. Any other questions or comments are welcome in the comments below. Let's situate some points in this situation.

Week 5 Starting Line-ups and Points:

Frog: Ronnie star (76), Vinnie (10), Sam (42)
@NotPinnock: Ronnie star (76), Situation (20), Jwoww (20)
@ckalange: Sam star (84), Situation (20), Deena (0)
@mattsisto: Sam star (84), Vinnie (10), DJ Pauly D (5)
@mikedashin: Deena star (0), Sammi (42), Ronnie (38)
@poloshot: Vinnie star (20), Situation (20), Jwoww (20)
Owen: Deena star (0), Ronnie (38), Jwoww (20)
Andy: Deena star (0), Vinnie (10), Snooki (0)

Week 5 Team Scoring:

Frog: 128
@NotPinnock: 116
@ckalange: 104
@mattsisto: 99
@mikedashin: 80
@poloshot: 60
Owen: 58
Andy: 10

Big Board after Week 5:

1st) 398 points (Frog)
2nd) 392.5 points (@ckalange)
3rd) 345.5 points (Andy)
4th) 320.5 points (Owen)
5th) 276 points (@mattsisto)
6th) 271.5 points (@poloshot)
7th) 229.5 points (@NotPinnock)
8th) 220.5 points (@mikedashin)

And that's how the situation is situated. Congratulations to Frog on his first stop atop the leaderboard. Interestingly enough we've had a different leader every week. I should start writing these right after the episode ends btw. I have absolutely no idea what happened on the "next week on." Which is almost better in a way. I think I'm better when I just trust my Jersey Shore gut and let the Situation situate himself in Karma to bring home those points. Unless Vinnie situates them for himself first. I'm out!

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