Google Analytic

Monday, October 18, 2010

Week 12: Oh yeah, week 12, YEEEEAAAHHHHH


What a season it has been. It makes me sad to say this is my second to last Jersey Shore point post of the year. Noooooooo!!! You know what I think we're seeing though? The Situation really getting changed by the fame. Being a lousy wingman, parking wherever he wants, that bored's all about him changing now. Next Season is going to be ridiculously interesting. But we have some work to do before then.

Last week was a point extravaganza. There was also the first social point scoring (the entire cast was kicked out of the club for 3 pts each) since they all toasted to "Miami Bitch" in the first episode. This is great just because it's nice to see every JSFL team getting some points.

For the third time this season Vinnie was the MVP with 29 points. He made out with Ramona twice (10 points), smooshed Ramona (15 pts), said "situation" once, and got kicked out of the club (3pts)

Next up was DJ Pauly D who scored 28 points. He brought home two randoms (10 points), made out with two different girls (5 pts each), said "Situation" a personal record 5 times, plus the 3 points for the club kick out.

Situation was next with 22 points. He brought home two randoms (10 points), got kicked out of the bar, and said "situation" a season record 9 times. That's right, the Situation said, "Situation" 9 times. Let that sink in.

Ronnie and Sam both scored 10.5 points. They made out with each other in the hot tub (5 points x1.5) and were forcibly removed from the club for 3.

Finally, Snooki and Jwoww scored 7 points for when they were both crying over Snook's friend leaving (On a side note, @poloshot pointed out how ridiculous it is that they get so home sick when they're only gone like 6 weeks) and they both got kicked out of the club too.

In list form:

Vinnie: 29
DJ Pauly D: 28
The Situation: 22
Ronnie: 10.5
Sammi: 10.5
Jwoww: 7
Snooki: 7

Week 12 Team Scoring

@ckalange: 79
@NotPinnock: 64
@mattsisto: 61.5
@handyslunch: 45.5
@robertageorge: 32.5
@poloshot: 28
@wickedcoolmatt: 17.5
@MollyMSmith: 14

Big Board after 12 weeks:

1st) @ckalange (536.5)
2nd) @mattsisto (506.5)
3rd) @robertageorge (469)
4th) @NotPinnock (458.5)
5th) @handyslunch (437.5)
6th) @poloshot (353)
7th) @wickedcoolmatt (348)
8th) @MollyMSmith (335.5)

So what do we know going into the final week?

@Ckalange is pretty secure on top of the leaderboard unless Ron-Ron blows up and they show him and Sammi smooshing a few times and DJ Pauly does nothing. In that case @mattsisto can maybe catch him. This is obviously a long shot.

@NotPinnock is very much in the hunt for third place especially if the Situation doesn't have a big episode. @robertageorge has Ronnie and the Situation so really it'll come down to whether Sitch does something big. Similarly, @handyslunch isn't out of it necessarily but he'll need a bigger week from Sammi than Vinnie which at this point seems like a long shot too.

@poloshot (Ron-Jwoww-Sam) will finish higher than @wickedcoolmatt (Jwoww-Sam-Trashbags) because of his five point lead. Whether @Mollymsmith can beat either of them comes down to whether or not Snooki has a big episode.

What's interesting is that there are three races going on: the race for first, the race for third, and the race for not the bottom. I think only the race for the top is out of reach. That said:

I'm going to try to jinx @ckalange now and say he's definitely going to win it, not a chance anything goes wrong for him, there's no chance Ronnie puts up any points, this is pretty much over.

I'll see you on Thursday.

ps Does anyone else think Vinnie's girl Ramona is kinda busted? Discuss.

Week 11: Post-Angelina

Hey y'all- this episode was the one right after Angelina left. Quick recap if you can't quite remember it:

Snooki's friend Ryder came to visit and they got drunk a lot. Vinnie finally hooked up with Ramona. The Situation was a real jerk and tried to ruin everyone's time at the club.

Point wise DJ Pauly D gets the mvp with 7. He said "situation" twice and made out with a random at Klutch (5 pts)

Vinnie scored 5 for making out with Ramona.

The Situation said "Situation" once. So,

Team Scoring:

@ckalange 13
@NotPinnock 12
@handyslunch 7
@mattsisto 6
@robertageorge 1

The Big Board after 11 Weeks:

1st) @ckalange (457.5)
2nd) @mattsisto (445)
3rd) @robertageorge (436.5)
4th) @NotPinnock (394.5)
5th) @handyslunch (392)
6th) @wickedcoolmatt (330.5)
7th) @polosthot (325)
8th) @mollymsmith (321.5)

No real changes from last week, @NotPinnock jumped into 4th, The Situation is a jerk, and I'm going to start watching this past weeks now.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Week 10: The Staten Island Dump

Hey #JSFL, my apologies for waiting until literally the day of to post last week's scores but I've been away from vt and all over the place. Enough excuses. The worst part about posting late is I can barely remember the episode and am left with a scoresheet with events I can't remember. That said...

The Situation was this weeks mvp with 48 points. He made out twice (10 pts), smooshed once (15), got hit by Angelina (15 pts), said Situation three times (3 pts), and brought home a random (5 pts). As a side note, I'll never get tired of him calling for cabs and the confusing the operator with the name "Situation."

Next up was the Staten Island Dump with 34 points. She made out with Jose (5 pts), fought Snooki (10 pts), fought the Situation (15 pts), and cried (4 pts). Next season we're going to have to discuss a point category for members leaving the show. It goes against my grain the same way I don't think people who leave the Real World should be able to compete on challenges; at the same time it sucks for the teams that lost Trash Bags this week.

Snooki put up 20 points last week. She made out at the club (5 pts), flashed the entire club (5 public indecency points), and fought Trash Bags (10 pts)

Jwoww scored 4 points for crying when her ugly boyfriend Tom left.

Vinnie scored 1 point for saying "Situation".

In List Form:

Situation: 48 points
Trash Bags: 34 points
Snooki: 20 points
Jwoww: 4 points
Vinnie: 1 point

Wek 10 Team Points:

@RobertAGeorge: 82 points
@MollyMSmith: 58 points
@Ckalange: 49 points
@mattsisto: 49 points
@wickedcoolmatt: 38 points
@NotPinnock: 21 points
@Handyslunch: 20 points
@poloshot: 4 points

Big Board after Week 10:

1st) @Ckalange (444.5)
2nd) @mattsisto (439)
3rd) @RobertAGeorge (426.5)
4th) @handyslunch (385)
5th) @NotPinnock (382.5)
6th) @wickedcoolmatt (330.5)
7th) @poloshot (325)
8th) @MollyMSmith (321.5)

What do we know going into the final stretch? It's impossible for @RobertAGeorge to overtake @mattsisto without Angelina because now their teams are the same with Ronnie and The Situation. Similarly, the difference between first and second place is the performance of Ronnie vs DJ Pauly D. They're both wifed up at this point so how much could their scores move? It may become a game of inches with Pauly D racking up "situation" points every now and then.

The competition for the middle of the leaderboard is heating up. The difference between teams @handyslunch and @NotPinnock is Sammie/Vinnie. @NotPinnock is 2.5 points behind but I like Vinnie to put up more points than Sammie so I think we'll see some moves there. Neither of these teams are out of it especially considering the 3rd place team just lost Angelina.

The bottom of the leaderboard is turning into a tight race too. @poloshot needs some performance out of Ronnie if he's going to overtake @wickedcoolmatt. They both have Sammie and Jwoww so these next few weeks will be telling. Finally, @MollyMSmith still has a punchers chance for not last place if Snooki can keep putting up points. I actually like her to overtake both @poloshot and @wickedcoolmatt because, with Jwoww on all three of their teams, there's no way Snooki doesn't outscore Sammie for the rest of the season, barring some miraculous turn of events.

It's really heating up. This is exciting. I don't think anyone is safe.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Week 9 Point Breakdown: It's T-Shirt Time

Greetings JSFL peeps-

Aside from the Situation posing and getting himself jacked up before calling his lady friend this episode was pretty dull. Let's get right into it:

Jwoww was the point leader for week 8 with 20 points. She made out with her ugly bf for 5 points and they smooshed for 15.

Angelina scored 9 total points. She brought home a random from the beach (5 points) and started crying on the phone with her mother (4 points)

The Situation scored 7 points. He made out in the club (5 points) and said "Situation" twice (although I'd argue he should be awarded a hundred points for each time the laundry woman said "el Situation" because it was hilarious)

DJ Pauly D scored 2 points for saying "situation" twice.

In List Form:

Jwoww: 20 points
Angelina: 9 points
Situation: 7 points
DJ Pauly D: 2 points

Week 9 Team Points:

@wickedcoolmatt: 29
@mollymsmisth: 29
@poloshot: 20
@robertageorge: 16
@ckalange: 9
@mattsisto: 7
@notpinnock: 2
@handyslunch: 2

Big Board after 9 Episodes:

1st) @ckalange (395.5)
2nd) @mattsisto (390)
3rd) @handyslunch (365)
4th) @notpinnock (361.5)
5th) @robertageorge (344.5)
6th) @poloshot (321)
7th) @wickedcoolmatt (292.5)
8th) @mollymsmith (263.5)

A few topics worth discussing:

1) I think we should consider a point category for characters spending nights in the same bed. Ronnie and Sam spend almost every night together in the Smash Room yet they almost do not exist on the point sheet. The same would hold true for Snooki spending the night with Vinnie, Angeline and Jose, and anyone else. It won't count for as much as a hook-up but it should be represented somewhere, maybe with 3 points.

2) I've been defining a random person as someone whose first appearance on the show leads to them coming back to the house. Angelina meeting that random dude at the beach counts; Pauly D bringing back Rocio (I think that's her name) after having been out with her numerous times does not count. I think you'll agree however that there is a grey area in there. For instance, this week the Situation is going to invite his lady from the club bathroom over to smoosh. Is she a random now?

Obviously the only way we can add point categories is with the approval of at least 50% of the league. I look forward to hearing your thoughts. Hugs and smooshes.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Pre-VMA Show Point Breakdown: That Looks Like a Really Creepy Scene Out There

It's a double post day for the #JSFL. Here's what I've got point-wise for the Pre-VMA Episode followed by some hilarious quotes. It was a great quote ep if not a high scoring one.

DJ Pauly D was the MVP with 28 points. He brought home 2 randoms (5 pts each), smooshed one of them (15 pts) and said Situation three times (1 pt each)

The Situation put up 12 points. He made out with someone in the club (5 pts), brought a random home (5 pts) and said Situation twice.

Angelina scored 11 points. She made out with one of her dudes (5 pts), brought one home (5 pts) and said Situation once (1 pt). I didn't count her as having smooshed the random because there wasn't any evidence that she did, either them in bed or him leaving in the morning. The last thing you saw was him on the couch with her drinking out of the red solo cups.

Ron-Ron said Creepy once (1 pt)

Jwoww called her bf once (1 pt) and told him she was going to make some meatballs and go to sleep.

Vinnie, Snooki, and Sammi all put up 0's.

In List Form:

DJ Pauly D: 28 pts
Situation: 12 pts
Angelina: 11 pts
Ron-Ron: 1 pt
Jwoww: 1 pt

Pre-VMA Team Points:

@ckalange: 40
@handyslunch: 28
@NotPinnock: 28
@mattsisto: 13
@RobertAGeorge: 12
@wickedcoolmatt: 12
@MollyMSmith: 12
@poloshot: 2

Big Board After 7.5 Weeks:

1st) @ckalange (386.5)
2nd) @mattsisto (383)
3rd) @handyslunch (363)
4th) @NotPinnock (359.5)
5th) @RobertAGeorge (328.5)
6th) @poloshot (301)
7th) @wickedcoolmatt (263.5
8th) @MollyMSmith (234.5)

I'd like to congratulate @ckalange for knocking me off the top of the leaderboard after a 3 week reign of terror.

Here are some great quotes from this episode that I just had to put down:

"We hear you like to visit the Staten Island dump this time of year." -The Situation, to Vinny, about Angelina

"It's like a broad: you can borrow it but you've got to bring it back." Uncle Nino

Uncle Nino referred to Mike The Situation as "Mike Sanitation" which just about killed me.

"That looks like a really creepy scene right now." -Ronnie about everyone in the hot tub

"I went to the doctor, he told me to stop drinking, stop doing drugs, stop having sex. You know what I did? I switched fucking doctors." -Gross Drunk Uncle Nino (who I hope becomes a recurring character)

"Ask them if they're DTF. Don't waste any time. It's Saturday night." -The Situation. This one blew my mind because I can't imagine myself ever in a club somehow asking someone if they were in fact "DTF." Ahh, excuse me, I was wondering if there was a chance that later maybe you and I could, um, ah, uh, ahh, nevermind. Then again, I'm not week 7.5 MVP DJ Pauly D.

Be well. See you Thursday for what looks like a solid episode. I just hope Ron-Ron starts drinking more Ron-Ron Juice or @ckalange is going to be tough for anyone to beat.

Week 7 Point Breakdown: Vincenzo is King of the Smoosh

Greetings Jersey Shore Fantasy League,

It's about five days late but below is the point breakdown for last Thursday's episode (the second half of the fight/not the one before the VMA's) Again, sorry it took so long to get it up, I've been partying pretty hard. If my timing happens to be off at all in terms of when exactly these things happened you'll have to forgive me: I scored it on Friday but am trying to recap it on Tuesday. Anyways, no more excuses.

It pleases to no end to announce that Vinnie is the Week 7 MVP with 60 points. He made out with one random in the club (5 points), made out with her at home (5 points for the makeout, 5 points for bringing a random home) and then he hooked up with her (15 pts) Later in the episode, he made out with Angelina in the cab (7.5 pts) and then smooshed her for 22.5 points. Solid points for Vincenzo.

Snooki also had a monster week with 45 points. She brought home two randoms (5 pts each), smooshed both of them (15 pts each) and had a in the club make-out (5 pts) The two randoms were the guy from the night before (no longer added as a random point after the first night) and his man-grenade friend. I've also given Jwoww credit for that random because he was coming over to see her.

Angelina scored 30 points for making out with Vinnie (7.5) and then smooshing with Vinnie (22.5)

Jwoww put up 25 points. She no-showed at work (5 pts), fought Sammi (15 pts for same sex fight w/roommate), and with Snooki brought home the random man-grenade who was coming because she was there.

Sammi put up 22.5 points. 15 for fighting Jwoww, 7.5 for making out with Ron-Ron in the club.

Ronnie got 7.5 points for making out with Sammi in the club.

DJ Pauly D said Situation once (1 pt)

The Situation put up a big 0

In List Form:

Vinnie: 60 pts
Snooki: 45 pts
Angelina: 30 pts
Jwoww: 25 pts
Sammi: 22.5 pts
Ron-Ron: 7.5
DJ Pauly D: 1

Week 7 Team Points:

@NotPinnock: 106
@MollyMSmith: 100
@wickedcoolmatt: 77.5
@handyslunch: 68.5
@mattsisto: 67.5
@ckalange: 61
@poloshot: 55
@RobertAGeorge: 37.5

Leader Board After 7 Weeks:

1st) @mattsisto (370 points)
2nd) @ckalange (346.5 points)
3rd) @handyslunch (335 points)
4th) @NotPinnock (331.5 points)
5th) @RobertAGeorge (316.5 points)
6th) @poloshot (299 points)
7th) @wickedcoolmatt (251.5 points)
8th) @MollyMSmith ( 222.5 points)

Going to watch Sunday's Ep and score it this afternoon. Be well.

Friday, September 3, 2010

Episode 6: The Fight (the first half anyways)

Hello all, going to make this pretty brief because I'm on my iPad and it's not fun to type. Enough about me, here's the breakdown:

The Situation was once again the MVP with 32 points. He brought home a random (5 pts), made out with her in the cab (5 pts) hooked up with her (15 pts), made out with another girl at the club (5 pts) and said "situation" twice (1 pt each).

Snooki had a big week with 27.5 points. She hooked up with Vinnie (22.5 with the 1.5x multiplier) and flashed the camera (blurcles) on the patio for 5 points.

Vinnie hooked up with Snooki plus he said "situation" and "little situation" for a total of 24.5 points.

Sammi scored 23 points for fighting Jwoww (10 pts same sex fight with the 1.5x roommate multiplier) and she cried twice (4 pts each)

Jwoww scored 17 points, the Sammi fight (15) plus calling her bf twice (1 pt each). Not sure where that bf has been this whole time but whatever.

Angelina made out with DJ Pauly D (7.5 with the roommate multiplier), brought home a random (5 pts) and said Situation once (1 pt)

DJ Pauly D put up 11.5 points with the Angelina make out (7.5) and having said Situation four times (1 pt each)

Ronnie put up 0 points for the second week in a row.

In List Form:

The Situation: 32
Snooki: 27.5
Vinnie: 24.5
Sammi: 23
Jwoww: 17
Angelina: 13.5
DJ Pauly D: 11.5

Week 6 Team Totals:

@ckalange: 68
@NotPinnock: 63.5
@handyslunch: 62
@MollyMSmith: 58
@mattsisto: 56.5
@wickedcoolmatt: 53.5
@robertageorge: 45.5
@poloshot: 40

Leaderboard through Week 6

@mattsisto: 302.5
@ckalange: 285.5
@RobertAGeorge: 279
@handyslunch: 266.5
@poloshot: 244
@NotPinnock: 222.5
@wickedcoolmatt: 174
@MollyMSmith: 122.5

What I take away from this leaderboard is that it still is anyone's game. I certainly don't think anyone is comfortable on top of the leaderboard and, as happy as I am to lead another week, Ronnie slowing down scares me.

Have a great weekend folks, drink some Ron-Ron Juice because nothing is better at getting the party started.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

The Fight Post

I assume at this point you're all as excited about Jwoww/Sammi I (I'm hoping it's a series of fights along the lines of Ali/Frazier but for our generation) so I thought I might as well give a full fight breakdown as if these two were boxers. I'll admit a large part of this is that the last fight I saw was Cotto/Foreman and that was months ago so I'm kind of hurting for boxing talk.

Sammi is a huge underdog in this fight. Jwoww is looking more muscular than we've seen her look in the past and she's been talking about fighting pretty much every episode. We've also had some evidence that she's actually training as a fighter: "I'm putting vaseline on my face, and then I'm kicking her ass" and when the Situation mentioned having seen her at the gym working the heavy bag. Not many girls I know do that.

We also know a good bit about what to expect when Jwoww fights. There were two instances last season that are telling because they were both completely different and showcased two different attributes of Jwoww's technique. You may recall the first fight in a bar when some girl called Snooki fat. Jwoww pushed the girl, circled so she had plenty of room behind her to maneuver, and proceeded to grab the girl's hair with her left hand, pull her head down so she couldn't see, and then work her with about five well placed upper-cuts to the jaw/face area. What can we take away from this exchange? The first thing is that Jwoww's ring awareness spot-on. Moving away from objects to minimize the chances of losing her balance is as important in Jersey Shore fighting as staying off the ropes is in boxing. Secondly, Jwoww had a fight strategy. Her hair-grab-upper-cut combo looked well practiced and in this case was extremely well executed. Bottom line: Jwoww stomped this girl and it's too bad the victim was blurcled because I would have liked to see the result of Jwoww's uppercut combo.

The second fight was really just a punch but it again speaks volumes about Jwoww as a fighter. Last year in Atlantic City the Situation had Jwoww forcibly removed from a club. She was waiting for him when he got back but because Vinnie was in the way she couldn't get to the Situation. While Vinnie was pushing her away she managed to slip half her body away and with the backside of her left hand knuckled the Situation right in the jaw. Hard. Jwoww knew that she wasn't going to get in a hard right but, sizing up the situation (no pun intended), she managed to land a fully extended back-hand (with her offhand!) directly to the jaw. This speaks again towards her ring awareness but also to her precision as a puncher. She fully extended her arm and backhanded him with very little time to place her punch. The time factor is what's most interesting: she knew exactly how far away she had to be to land the punch so she allowed Vinnie to push her into the other ring and, at exactly the right moment and distance, she turned to land the punch. I just can't get over how mentally steady she is in a fight.

At this point you may be thinking that Sammi has no chance but there are a few things we should consider first.

Sammi has a huge reach advantage. And sure, Jwoww probably could neutralize that with some strong ring generalship but it's not just going to be the two of them. Stamped Snooki is right in the middle trying to break them up and stop the fight. This works hugely to Sammi's advantage. Depending on the reach difference it's possible that Sammi could land punches on Jwoww and that Jwoww might not be able to reach her. I could see Sammi landing punches on Jwoww (throwing them over Snooki) while Jwoww tries to grab at her without success.

We also have to consider that Jwoww is fighting because she likes to fight. Sammi is going to be legitimately angry. She's been shit on by Ronnie for 5 episodes. Her two alleged friends conspired to lie to her and then called her weak. At this point she probably assumes like everyone else that there's something between Jwoww and Ronnie. She is going to be angry. What does this mean? She has something to fight for and at a certain point even ring-generalship and technique should be scared of someone fighting with all of their emotions. It just may catch Jwoww off guard. Jwoww probably doesn't expect Sammi to even fight her so when Sammi comes at her HARD there's a chance Jwoww doesn't have time to adjust.

However, if Jwoww does adjust it's curtains for Sammi. I'm not saying she has no chance but Jwoww is a strong opponent. My decision: Jwoww wins in round 4 after the fight is stopped by the roommates. If the guys aren't around though, this one could go the distance. We shall see.

Monday, August 30, 2010

Week 5 Points: We Just Didn't Want to Deal With The Drama...That We Caused

Good afternoon, Jersey Shore Fantasy Leaguers! Sorry I was so tardy posting the points this week. I was drinking like I was in South Beach. Let's get right to it (If you want to skip right to the points, they're in bold below):

It was a big week for The Situation who scored 48 points. In the club he made out with two women (5 points each). You might think it was more because they showed quick flashes four separate times but trust me, I dissected the club/hook up sequence and the backgrounds were similar. As a side note, it appears DJ Pauly D bedded the tall brunette the Situation was making out with at the club.

DJ Pauly D, the Situation, and Vinnie brought home two girls with them from the club (worth 5 points each) HOWEVER, the two other random girls were ones the Situation called himself so I'm going to count those two for the Situation only (giving him a total of 20 "bring home random" points)

All three members of Team MVP implied that they smooshed those three randoms who spent the night and that's enough for me to award them 15 points each.

The other big point score was Sammi who cried, to my count, 4 separate times (worth 4 points each). It's tough to decipher individual bouts of crying because two occasions occurred most likely in the same confessional period but were placed at different times in the episode. I counted the confessional crying (same outfit, same confessional) as one crying.

Some odds and ends:

Snooki cried once (4 points) and called Emilio once (1 point) which I counted because the sentiment was there regardless of whether they were technically dating.

The Situation said "Situation" three times (3 points) DJ Pauly D said "Situation" once, Angelina said it twice.

Ronnie and Jwoww put up zero points.

In list form:

The Situation: 48 points
DJ Pauly D: 26 points
Vinnie: 25 points
Sammi: 16 points
Snooki: 5 points
Angelina: 2 points

Team Scoring:

@CKalange: 99 points
@mattsisto: 73 points
@NotPinnock: 56 points
@RobertAGeorge: 50 points
@handyslunch: 47 points
@wickedcoolmatt: 18 points
@poloshot: 16 points
@MollyMSmith: 7 points

The Leaderboard Through 5 Weeks:

@mattsisto: 246 points
@RobertAGeorge: 233.5 points
@Ckalange: 217.5 points
@handyslunch: 204.5 points
@poloshot: 204 points
@NotPinnock: 162 points
@wickedcoolmatt: 120.5 points
@MollyMSmith: 64.5 points

That's the Situation. Big Episode this week. I was thinking about letting someone guest score if there are any takers. Keep it real.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

The Big Trade Post

Good afternoon Jersey Shore Fantasy League!

There are three days left for trades and I thought it would be pertinent to put up some numbers for the various characters as well as trade possibilities for teams most in need. Here goes:

No surprise here: Ronnie is the MVP for the first half of the season. Jwoww is pulling up the rear with a grand total of 1 point.

Ronnie: 117 points
Sammi: 70 points
DJPauly D: 62.5 points
The Situation: 35 points
Angelina: 31.5 points
Snooki: 25 points
Vinnie: 21 points
Jwoww: 1 point

It's clear that any team with Jwoww is going to need to make some moves. I see teams with Jwoww trading her and another third round pick for a top tier performer.

Big trades would include Ronnie or the Situation for Jwoww and Angelina, Jwoww and Sammi, etc...

Teams at the bottom of the leaderboard should consider moving two of their players for one mvp caliber in an attempt to get back in the game.

We also know that Jwoww and Sammi are going to get in a fight and so are Snooki and Angelina. However, same sex fights are only worth 10 pts each plus the x1.5 for the roommate. Compared to one night when the Situation, DJ Pauly D, Vinnie and Ronnie might bring home four random girls at 5pts each any advantage would be eliminated.

Teams @MollyMSmith (Snooki, Jwoww, Angelina) and @wickedcoolmatt (Jwoww, Sammie, Angelina) have the most to gain and are also in a tough spot because of the distance between them and the top of the leaderboard.

A midlevel team like @handyslunch who has Snooki and Sammi is in a position to leverage for a top tier player based on the fact that Sammi has performed so well so far and common knowledge would lead you to believe that Snooki has to do Something. Were he to trade Snooki and Sammi for Ronnie his team would look pretty tough going into the stretch.

Sammi is a huge question mark though. With the recent break from Ronnie it seems unlikely she'll continue to put up these all-star numbers.

If there were any way for a player to leverage to somehow get Ronnie, DJ Pauly D, and The Situation on their team it would be a lock on the top of the leaderboard going forward.

Here are the teams as they appear now:

@mattsisto: (Situation, Ronnie, Vinnie)
@poloshot: (Ronnie, Jwoww, Sammi)
@handyslunch: (Snooki, DJ Pauly D, Sammi)
@wickedcoolmatt: (Jwoww, Sammi, Angelina)
@MollyMSmith: (Snooki, Jwoww, Angelina)
@ckalange: (Situation, DJ Pauly D, Vinnie)
@NotPinnock: (Snooki, DJ Pauly D, Vinnie)
@RobertAGeorge: (Situation, Ronnie, Angelina)

The time is ripe for trades. We'll see if anyone makes any moves.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Episode 4 Points Break-Down: I Don't Like Tests, That's Why I Didn't Go To College

Good Morning JSFL

This was a slow week point wise but once again Ronnie was the MVP. We saw Snooki break up with her boyfriend as well as a Sammi/Ronnie split. We also some Ronnie pulling some great Infidelity grinding points. Here's how I scored it.

At the beginning of the episode Ronnie was killing it at the club dancing. Instead of counting each instance shown on camera I counted each individual girl he was dancing with. There were three: the girl in a tight black mini skirt, the girl in the red dress, and the short Asian girl. Each one counted for 5 points each leaving Ronnie with 15 infidelity grinding points.

Snooki called her boyfriend for 1 point and they broke up for 20.

Ronnie and Sammi broke up for the 20 points x1.5 with a roommate for 30 points each. I had some qualms about using the roommate multiplier here if only because it ended up giving @poloshot 84 points for this episode alone, more than some teams have total. However, that's the law as according to the rules and at the half-way point of the season I still think anything can happen.

Sammi was crying once worth 4 points

Ronnie had an awesome exhibition of Puking worth 5 points. He also should win a prize for being the drunkest person I've ever seen on television. I honestly fear for his well-being.

Points in list form:

Ronnie: 50
Sammi: 34
Snooki: 21
Situation: 1

Week 4 Team Scoring

@poloshot: 84
@handyslunch: 55
@RobertAGeorge: 51
@mattsisto: 51
@wickedcoolmatt: 34
@MollyMSmith: 21
@NotPinnock: 21
@ckalange: 1

Total Scoring after 4 weeks:

@poloshot: 188
@RobertAGeorge: 183.5
@mattsisto: 173
@handyslunch: 157.5
@ckalange: 118.5
@notpinnock: 106
@wickedcoolmatt: 102.5
@MollyMSmith: 57.5

Finally, just a reminder that this week is open for trading. I have some moves I want to make that you all will hear about. That's the situation.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Episode 3 Point Breakdown: Vincenzo Is Going To Be King of The Sandwich

Good Morning #JSFL'ers!

I had a busy weekend but I'm happy to be back in the swing of things with my beloved Jersey Shore Fantasy League. Does anyone else find themselves tallying points in real life? I saw a girl crying over the weekend and I was like, "oh that's four points for her team." It's just like that now.

In this post I'm going to break down the points from last week, explain my thoughts on the Vin/Snook no-hook-up and the Ronnie/Sammi dating situation, and put up the leader-boards in case you missed them last week. No fears, there will be no philosophical analysis although I think you could make a strong point that Ron-Ron has redefined the phrase "drunken disaster."

Anyways, here goes:

The big points score this weekend came from The Situation, DJ Pauly D, and Vinnie going out on MVP night. Points were accrued for bringing home randoms, four of them, worth 5 points each. I thought for a second that there may have been five, there was a point where in the pool section there was a brunette in a trucker hat but it may have just been Snooki. Evidence was inconclusive.

Ronnie and Sammi Sweetheart put up some big points combined for 2 make-outs (five points) x1.5 with a roommate plus one inappropriate conduct at work worth 3 points (also x1.5 with a roommate) for a grand total 19.5 points each. Sammi Sweetheart also was crying once (worth 4 points), something Sammi Sweetheart teams can look forward to scoring regularly.

Small scores included The Situation saying "the Situation" twice, DJ Pauly D saying "situation" once and "creep" once.

Snooki called her bf for 1 point.

Angelina cried once worth 4 points.

Week 3 Character Points:

Sammi Sweetheart: 23.5 points
The Situation and DJ Pauly D: 22 points
Vinnie: 20 points
Ron-Ron: 19.5 points
Angelina: 4 points
Snooki: 1 point

Team points:

@ckalange: 64 points
@mattsisto: 61.5 points
@handyslunch: 46.5 points
@RobertAGeorge: 45.5 points
@poloshot: 43 points
@NotPinnock: 40.5 points
@wickedcoolmatt: 27.5 points
@MollyMSmith: 5 points

Total Points:

@RobertAGeorge: 132.5
@mattsisto: 122
@ckalange: 117.5
@poloshot: 104
@handyslunch: 102.5
@NotPinnock: 85
@wickedcoolmatt: 68.5
@MollyMSmith: 36.5

This post feels kind of long. I'm going to do the other stuff I mentioned in another post. I was also thinking about discussing possible point shifts in points that might bring the bottom part of the leaderboard closer to the top. That's the situation.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Snook, Digital Lock-in, and Our Perceptive Realities

Last night I almost fell into a giant fit of shouting and exclamation points when on twitter some girl, referring to the cast of The Jersey Shore, both “felt embarrassed for them” and wished they would “go back to where they came from.” Now at this point we have to assume that she knew what she was getting into watching in the first place; he might lie about it but even the president knows who Snooki is and I’m sure it’s because one of his daughters, or maybe both, were part of the five million viewers the show garnered in the first two episodes.

What bothered me about my twitter friend’s offhanded dismissal is that I felt she was over-looking an essential truth about The Jersey Shore: in so many ways it is symptomatic of the culture that produced it. In my mind anyone who has a twitter or facebook page is not much different in action than the cast members. The only difference is the scale.

140 characters isn’t enough to explain this thought: there isn’t much difference between me and Snooki.

I think we can all agree that these are narcissistic times. In their book “The Narcissism Epidemic” the authors cited several studies and noted increases of as much as 30% in the rate of narcissism as measured by the Narcissistic Personality Inventory between 1979 and 2006. Even more shocking is the statement (taken from another study by the New York Times) that “the year by year increase between 2002 and 2007 in these data is twice as large as the year by year increase found between 1979 and 2006.” Still another study of 4,000 students from the University of South Alabama polled between 2006 and 2009 when compared to a 1994 study showed “a huge increase in narcissistic traits: a full third (1 out of 3) of USA students answered the majority of the questions in a narcissistic direction in 2008-09, up from 1 out of 5 in 1994. Thus 89% more USA students answered the majority of questions in the narcissistic direction in 2008-2009 compared to 1994.”

It’s obviously no great leap to the statement that the cast members of the Jersey Shore are themselves huge narcissists. It takes a special kind of person to flaunt their abs in front of a nationwide audience or to brag that they are “the princess of Poughkeepsie,” however ridiculous that may seem. But their over-exposure isn’t the interesting part. Nor is it that we too share some of their narcissistic qualities. It is interesting that in so many ways they represent breaking the barrier between ourselves in reality and the third wall of our self-awareness.

Wait, what? Here goes:

Internet culture has allowed us to embrace our narcissism and present ourselves as we wish to be seen. I don’t think there is any argument that who we are on twitter or facebook is probably a little shinier than the real life reality. The reason for this is obvious: it’s only natural that we want to show our peers only the finer parts of our character. But it does create a divide between the three basic parts of our character: who we are in reality, how we wish to be seen in the real world and online, and the gap between how we want our projected reality to be seen and the extent to which people buy into it. The first two parts are self-explanatory and relatively non-interesting. The third part is only interesting in as much as it relates to the first two.
There are two kinds of social reality: perceptive reality and objective reality. The first relates both to how we see ourselves and how we construct ourselves to be seen. Objective reality is all about what’s really happening. For instance, I might choose to post pictures of myself in which my nose does not look as big and Jewish. The objective reality is that my nose is in fact big and Jewish. But you wouldn’t know it you only had the digital perception to rely on. Another example is if I were to tweet on a sunny day “Oh my god, I can’t believe it’s raining so hard.” If you lived in the same town and at that moment read my tweet from a cubical in a basement without windows your perceptive reality would be that it was raining. Is it untrue? Objectively yes but only if you know the difference between the perceptive reality and the objective reality. Otherwise your perception becomes the objective reality.

A large part of how we spend our time now is in trying to eliminate the gap in perception and reality. Because we are narcissistic and we only put up the best images and statements about ourselves we are forever increasing the distance between reality and our own imagery. You could easily argue that we aren’t trying to become the people we present ourselves to be but I think that’s largely an act of self-deception: the decision to say one thing and not another, to post one picture and not another, the selection of one word over another speaks to our conscious and sub-conscious desire to shape the way we are perceived.

In his 2009 internet treatise “You Are Not A Gadget,” Jaron Lanier introduces the idea of personal lock-in. The term was originally used to describe the way software programmers followed similar basic steps on their way to more advanced platforming. For instance, the use of MIDI in music creation is a flawed system because it doesn’t account for the fullness of notes in reality. There is just one true C note as opposed to the reality of notes that can be even the smallest bit sharp or flat. The idea of a synthesized version of Brahms’ cello sonata in F is ludicrous particularly because the arrival at harmony from dissonant noise is part of the beauty of classical music and in the best of it is prevalent almost inaudibly in every note. Yet MIDI is the basis for all music programming. The reason for this is not because programmers don’t care about the intricacies of music and sound but that in its earliest stages programmers established the first few steps and everyone took for granted that this is the way things are supposed to be done. They became locked-in to the patterns of the people who programmed before them not out of laziness but because their thought was on developing new programs focused on steps 40 and higher and the first few steps in the programming process were the literal means to an end.

My fear is that we are becoming locked-in to the assumption that who we are online is who we are in reality. As social networking sites become more and more pervasive we accept as totally normal our online voice and images. The lock-in comes in the form of our losing touch with the gap between the objective reality and perceptive reality. We assume that there is no gap because we’ve so habituated ourselves to the task of digital sharing.

But what does all this have to do with Jersey Shore?

Reality television is a microcosm of the breakdown between perceptive reality and objective reality. The very word “reality” makes a play at our acceptance of the term because we know that these people can’t possibly be this way “in real life” yet the cinema verite way they are captured on camera and our relative suspension of disbelief tells us otherwise. At heart reality television is people acting as we expect people who want to be famous/infamous to act. That is to say, acting badly. The Jersey Shore is the apex of the genre.

Over the past twenty years MTV (followed by VH1, Oxygen, the networks, FX, Speed Network, et all…) has conditioned young people to act a certain way in front of cameras. The practical application of this conditioned response plus the feeling that they individually are so important as to deserve a nation-wide audience has led hundreds of young people to reality television notoriety. (I refuse to say ‘fame.’) But what is interesting is not their blatant attempts at self-aggrandizement but the times when they let their television personas slip and their real faces are exposed. In the first season Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino expresses his feelings for Sammi Sweetheart only to have Sammi Sweetheart choose the even more muscle-bound Ronnie instead. For a split second we stop seeing “The Situation” and see a man whose pride is wounded. It’s only a split second but it’s all we need. The Situation in the first season is ripe with these kinds of moments where his perceptive reality is confronted with objective reality and we are given the pleasure of watching.

That’s where reality television is at its very best: when we see others drop their narcissistic sense of self and the real person is exposed. On some sub-conscious level we are all struggling with the divide and it’s refreshing to watch someone lose their grip and let their real self shine through.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Episode 2 Points: I Don't Want To Downgrade Myself

What a night for the Jersey Shore Fantasy League! We had our first point dispute that was settled by the Czar of Reality @jacoby_ , DJ Pauly D put up a season high single episode total with 31.5 points, and Angelina continues to be the dark-horse putting up a surprising 25.5 points. Here's the breakdown:

The big score came when Angelina smacked DJ Pauly D. That normally nets 15 pts but between roommates we use the 1.5x for a grand total of 21.5 points for each of them.

Ronnie got a surprise tattoo worth 10 points.

Ronnie and Sammi made-out when he got back from the club worth 7.5 points each.

The Situation and DJ Pauly D each made out with one random at the club worth 5 points each.

The Situation referred to himself as "The Situation" a season high 6 times. DJ Pauly D said "Situation" 3 times plus an iteration of "Creepin" twice.

Angelina and Sammi Sweetheart both started crying once each.

In list form:

DJ Pauly D: 31.5 points
Angelina: 25.5 points
Ron-Ron: 17.5 points
Sammi: 11.5 points
The Situation: 11 points

Team Scoring for week 2:

@RobertAGeorge (Situation, Ronnie, Angelina)- 54 points
@handyslunch (Snooki, DJ Pauly D, Sammi)- 43 points
@ckalange (Situation, DJ Pauly D, Vinnie)- 42.5 points
@wickedcoolmatt (Jwoww, Sammi, Angelina)- 37 points
@NotPinnock (Snooki, DJ Pauly D, Vinnie) 31.5 points
@poloshot (Ronnie, Jwoww, Sammi)-29 points
@mattsisto (Situation, Ronnie, Vinnie)- 28.5 points
@MollyMSmith (Snooki, Jwoww, Angelina)- 25.5 points

Total points after two weeks:

@RobertAGeorge: 87 points
@poloshot: 61 points
@mattsisto: 60.5 points
@handyslunch: 56 points
@ckalange: 53.5 points
@NotPinnock: 44.5 points
@wickedcoolmatt: 41 points
@MollyMSmith 31.5 points

Monday, August 2, 2010

Quick thought for this week

I just had a brilliant thought about this coming week's episode. Walk with me...

You know how the episode only had about ten minutes in the club and cut to the girls at home and Jwoww putting vaseline on her face?

Do you remember how Jwoww said she was going to kick Angelina's ass? Also, you know how Jwoww does not mess around and likes fighting?

This episode is going to start with the guys and Angelina coming home from the bars and Jwoww is going to kick Angelina's ass. Heard it here first.

It makes me nervous because I don't have Jwoww on my team. I'd almost consider trading Sitch for her... tough call.

Saturday, July 31, 2010

His name is Ronnie, but you can probably call him Sloppy Joe (Episode 1 Analysis)

Quick preface: I'm standing on the shoulders of giants here. Many points have already been touched upon by Bill Simmons (twitter: sportsguy33) in his epic trash tv podcast with the Czar of reality @jacoby_. However, while Simmons does a JS podcast maybe once a month I will be able to take the time to break-down every week. Here goes.

The biggest question this season (and every season hereafter) is how the cast responds to fame. This is no longer the rag-tag group of guidos we know and love. Snooki's bedazzled cowboy hat speaks volumes. I also think it's telling that the four people road-tripping to MIA, that's Miami, are the top-tiered in pay scale. I think when it comes to the girls especially we're going to see more reserved behavior. The traditional double standard of promiscuous men being "playboys" and promiscuous women being "sluts" will, in my opinion, play out here too. What we see in the preview of the girls fighting over Vinnie is going to become standard for this cast this season: the girls will keep it in the house, the boys will get creepy in Miami.

The one exception to this is Angelina who may end up being a rock-solid pick. We know next year Angelina is going to be replaced by this girl ( ) but what does that tell us about Angelina this year? She made it clear in this episode that she was willing to hook up (To Situation and Pauly D: "Who cares? I’m single now, if I hook up with one of youz one night, who gives a fuck?") so my guess is, having realized in just a few hours that she wasn't going to make friends with any of the girls, she throws herself at the male cast-members (we already know she's hooked up with Pauly and the Situation off camera) and then probably leaves after having been labeled "the slut no one likes." I for one will miss the Kim Kardashian of Staten Island. Those shorts she was wearing? The ones with the exposed red pockets? That was really something.

Getting back to the fame thing: I think we have a situation with The Situation. In the past few months he's become a legitimate star and accordingly has lost the desperation we saw in him season 1. That almost sycophantic desire to be liked and to show he was cool by sleeping with grenades is out the window. It's a sad day. But I suppose it was inevitable. You can't contain The Situation.

The last twenty-minutes are a microcosm for what we'll see this season: the girls are going to fight each other (verbally and otherwise), the guys are going to get annoyed and do their own thing (including clubbing and bringing home randoms), and eventually the girls will drag the guys into their drama.

Let's do a quote rundown because there were some classics:

DJ Pauly D: Can’t stand this weather, ya can’t get tanned in this weather, ya can’t creep in this weather, you can’t do anything… girls don’t come out in this weather, they stay in the house.

Snooki: I don’t go tanning tanning anymore because Obama put a 10% tax on tanning. I feel like he did that intentionally for us, like McCain would never put a 10% tax on tanning.. because he is pale and he would probably wanna be tanned.

Ronnie: I’m gonna have a good time and get creepy and get weird.

Jwoww (about Angelina): "I’m the Kim Kardashian of Staten Island”… with what ass? Pancake ass…

Angelina: Who cares? I’m single now, if I hook up with one of youz one night, who gives a fuck?

Snooki: I feel like a pilgrim from the friggin’ 20’s washing shit right now.

The Situation: Ronnie’s at the club, hooking up with Grenades… that is a bigger-ugly-chick and also Landmines.. which is a thin-ugly-chick .. and um, he's lovin’ life.

The Situation: His name is Ronnie, but you can probably call him Sloppy Joe

Jwoww: I’m putting Vaseline on my face, taking my earrings out, putting my hair up & I’m beating the crap out of her.

A note about that last line spoken by a true boxing fan:

You know who else puts Vaseline on their face? Boxers. So they don't get cut and the punches slide off. I'm so curious about Jwoww's background and whether she was around professional fighters. She's just a straight up brawler. Some people make a lot of noise but Jwoww actually wants to "take it outside" and I love that about her. One of my favorite moments in reality television history (that's hyperbole) is when she fought that girl last year for calling Snooki fat. She grabbed her by the hair and landed about five well placed uppercuts to the jaw. So...when Jwoww says she's putting Vaseline on her face, it's because she's planning on kicking some ass.

Friday, July 30, 2010

I'm in Miami, Bitch (Episode 1 Point Analysis)

Before I write anything I just want to say that there is no way I could have been more excited for this season to start.

It was a big night for Ronnie who scored twice for make-outs (5 points each) plus one threesome-makeout for 15 points. That's a quick 25 points in between the last commercial break and the end credits. If he keeps this pace I don't see any way that a team without Ronnie stays in contention. He also scored three 1-point "I'm in Miami, Bitch" and two 1-point "Situation".

DJ Pauly D was the second mvp for Episode 1 saying an iteration of "the Situation" or "Creepin" eight times worth 1-point each.

Snooki said "I'm in Miami, Bitch" three times.

Angelina said "Situation" once.

The rest of the cast got 1 point each for a group toast of "I'm in Miami, Bitch."

In list form:

Ron-Ron: 30
DJ Pauly D: 9
Snooki: 3
Angelina: 2
Jwoww: 1
Sammi: 1
The Situation: 1
Vinnie: 1

The one point question worth discussing is whether Ronnie should get points for "Girl Making Out With Girl (7pts)" I scored him for a make-out x3 but I also think you could count the two girls making out as well for 7 additional points. Since I already posted the point totals on twitter I'm going to let it slide this time (My team has Ronnie so I don't want people thinking I'm just running up the score)

Here's the list for team scoring:

BG: 33 pts
MS: 32 pts
PS: 32 pts
HL: 13 pts
NP: 13 pts
CK: 11 pts
MMS: 6 pts
WCM: 4 pts

That's all for now, I'll get an epsiode critique in sometime soon. That's the Situation

The Draft and Teams

We live blogged the draft via twitter but I'll record the picks in order here.

Round 1:

The Situation
Snooki (off the board)
The Situation
The Situation (off the board)

Round 2:

DJ Pauly D
Jwoww (off the board)
Ronnie (off the board)
DJ Pauly D
DJ Pauly D (off the board)

Round 3:

Angelina (off the board)
Vinnie (off the board)
Sammi (off the board)

The Teams

I'm going to acronym these to protect identities. The teams are listed in order from the first draft pick to the eighth pick.

HL: Snooki, DJ Pauly D, Sammi

NP: Snooki, DJ Pauly D, Vinnie

MS: The Situation, Ronnie, Vinnie

MMS: Snooki, Jwoww, Angelina

BG: The Situation, Ronnie, Angelina

WCM: Jwoww, Sammi, Angelina

CK: The Situation, DJ Pauly D, Vinnie

PS: Ronnie, Jwoww, Sammi

The Breakdown:

I was surprised by how quickly Snooki went. My thinking going in was that the guys (excepting Jwoww) would be putting up more points than the girls on a regular basis and that The Situation, DJ Pauly D, and Ronnie would be obvious picks over first round picks. Given my bias towards those three players I can't help but thinking MS, BG, and CK have the strongest teams.

WCM is in a tough spot with Sammi and Angelina in places 2 and 3 after Jwoww. I don't see them putting up many points.

PS has a punchers chance (literally) with Jwoww and Ronnie on his team. If Ronnie and Sammi start hooking up again and she fights Jwoww (because Jwoww hooks up with Ronnie?) it's a Jersey Shore Fantasy League trifecta. In that instance the difference maker between PS and MS is whether the Situation can balance their numbers.

MMS has a strong chance with Snooki, Jwoww, and Angelina. Not only will MMS get points for the Jwoww fight just mentioned but we also know from the teaser preview that Snooki and Angelina fight (over Vinnie). Anytime there is a scoring opportunity that takes place between roommates we multiply the total x1.5.

Finally, DJ Pauly D is a bit of a wild card. You can rely on him to say "Situation" a few times an episode but I'm not sure I remember him hooking up that often or fighting last season. Like Snooki, I think he may be the most likeable and the most characteristically Guido-ish but I'm not sure he scores the points.

The Points

1-Being late
2-Yelled at by boss
3-Inappropriate conduct (drinking, hooking up, etc.)
5-No show

3-Kicked out of bar
5-Cops talk to you

Hook up
5-Make Out
5-Public indecency (hot tub/patio included)
7-Girl making out with girl
15-Hook up

10-Same Sex
15-Girl hitting guy
100-Guy hitting girl (slaps, hard shoves, tosses, basic intent to harm, etc.)

5-Excessive grinding
10-Making out
20-BF/GF cheats on you during visit
25-Hook up

1-Call BF/GF
1-Any iteration of “I’m in Miami bitch”
1-Saying Guido, Guidette, (variations on) Creepin', or The Situation
2-BF/GF crying
5-Bring home random (per person)
10-Getting a tattoo or piercing
20-Break up with BF/GF
25-STD scare
50-Pregnancy scare

x1.5-Anything with a roommate

The Charter

The Draft:

Numbers ranging from 1-8 will be written on pieces of paper, folded, and placed in a hat. Players will pick a piece of paper and the draft will proceed from the first pick (1) through the 8th (8). In the second round picks will go from numbers 8-1. In the third round picks will go 1-8. Each cast-member will be available 3 times to be selected at any point. Once said cast-member has been picked 3 times he is off the board. Players may not select the same the same cast member twice.

All efforts will be made to place the draft at a time and place accessible to all participants. Should anyone be unable to attend the draft they may either choose someone to act for them or (ideally) represent themselves via speakerphone or the internets.


Trades will be allowed in between the initial draft and the first episode as well as during the half-way point of the season between weeks 4 and 5. Trades can come in any form but must be approved by at least 2 parties with no part in the trade. For instance, if one participant loses interest in the league he may offer to trade his cast members to another participant for a hot dog/beer/hearty handshake. The participant in this instance would need the approval of at least two other indifferent parties to finalize the trade.

There is no cap for the number of players allowed on a team. Should two participants decide to trade Sammy and Angelina for The Situation they would only need the approval of 2 non-involved parties for trade to be admissible.


The League Commissioner shall be responsible for tallying points and entering them into a google doc spread sheet that will be made available for all participants to view. In the event that a point total is disputed, the individual scores for said cast-member (as recorded by participants) will be averaged out and that average point total will stand.

If a cast-member is traded between weeks 4 and 5 their previously scored points do not migrate but remain with their former team. Team points will be tallied following the grand finale. In the event of a tie, points will be tallied during the “shit they should have shown” episode or, should that episode not take place, the winner will be chosen based on the amount of times their team has to be “bleeped” during the reunion show. Each Bleep will be worth one point even if it is a longer, sustained bleep.

Rule Changes:

Any questions or changes to the rules but be decided before the first episode begins or in the period between weeks 4 and 5. Any proposed changes must have the support of greater than 50% of the league. Similarly, if the league commissioner is found to be not up to task he may be voted out if greater than 50% of the league wishes however he must be replaced at that time by a candidate able to carry greater than 50% of the votes. If the original commissioner was voted out but no replacement is found he will keep his position but try to do a better job.

Welcome to the League

A few weeks ago I started a Jersey Shore Fantasy League.

Eight teams select 3 players each in a three round draft process. Every week I score the episode, tally team points, and put it on the big board (A google doc). In my next post I'll include the charter and the point categories.

The reason for this blog is to provide a place I can analyze espn-style the intricacies of reality television fantasy sports. I envision break-downs of past episodes, handicapping favorite teams, discussions of scoring ambiguities, and recipes for Ron-Ron Juice.

For example: We know Snooki and her boyfriend Emilio break up but is it caused by some infidelity (which rewards from 5 to 15 pts depending on the extent) or does it happen off camera? In the case of infidelity, will it be in time to counter Ronnie's strong showing or the Situation's near sycophantic pursuit of women? Will a team with Ronnie and Jwoww be able to carry a team with Sammi in the third round spot? If Jwoww fights both girl roommates and Vinnie sleeps with both of them, given hook ups get more points than fighting, does it make sense to pick Vinnie over Jwoww or can we rely on her to hook up more than Vinnie with people outside of the house?

So many questions. I'll try to answer them.